Before I post any more Valentine’s Day themed crafts, I want to acknowledge how hard this holiday can be sometimes. With everything that’s gone on this year, I’ve seen a lot of relationships crumble and a lot of single people struggle dating during the pandemic. Ironically, a holiday built around love can make people feel extremely lonely… and I wanted to address that a little bit.
We live in a society that puts romantic love on a pedestal… we are taught to spend our time looking for “the one”; someone who can complete us. Most movies show the main character lost through half the movie and finally finding themselves when the romantic love interest shows affection. Don’t get me wrong… true love sounds AMAZING and beautiful. I am extremely excited to find the person I want to spend my future with and even more excited to watch all my friends fall in love as we grow older… but I’m tired of watching people lose themselves in the search for love.
I had a friend tell me the other day that he can’t wait to find his forever partner so he can start making memories with her… so I asked him: why not start now? Wouldn’t it be amazing to find your soulmate and spend hours sitting on the porch, listening to the rain, sharing memories made before you met? I feel like it’s time for all of us to stop looking past all the amazing things in our lives while we search for that person who will love us as much as we love them.
It’s time to romanticize our own lives; to fall in love with ourselves so we accept nothing less from others… and so we can actually start living our lives instead of waiting for an undetermined amount of time. So how do we do it? Start by appreciating the people in your life. Show them the love they deserve and the love you want to receive. Surround yourself with people who see your light and encourage you to be the best person you can be… and be that person for them. The people we choose to surround ourselves with will influence us more than we realize, and this form of love is just as (if not more) important than traditional romantic love.
Next, find ways to focus on the parts of your life that bring you joy. Retrain your brain to see those instead of the things that stress you out or need fixed. How? There are a bunch of ways, but my favorite so far is 3 positives. Find a friend or a journal to share 3 positive things with every night. It could be a gorgeous sunset or how that person smiled when you complimented their shoes. Any 3 things, big or small. Every night. You’ll go from searching your day to find your positives to recognizing them through the day and having to narrow down your top 3. You’ll start truly loving and appreciating your days more and more every day (yes, even the bad ones).
Finally, figure out your love language. There’s a quiz called the 5 love languages. Take that quiz, read up on your top love languages, and learn to show yourself the love you need. For example: Quality time could mean to take time to do yoga or meditate every day, Acts of Service could be making sure the dishes are done before bed, Gifts could be a “treat yourself” night every week, Words of Affirmation could be repeating affirmations to yourself in the mirror, and Physical Touch could be getting a massage or hugging your pets. We all deserve SO much more love than we let ourselves accept, and I feel like that’s a lot of the reason we feel so lonely – especially around a holiday like Valentine’s Day.
So this year, take a minute to thank yourself for being here. Take the time to appreciate yourself and your existence. Give yourself the love you deserve. If you’re waiting on someone to give you permission to be your full, unabashed self, this is it. Don’t waste another minute waiting on another person to love you when you have all of that love inside you already!! Love you all more than you’ll ever know 😊 As always, if you take any fun pictures or videos, tag me on Instagram @SmileMakePeopleWonder and use the hashtag #DandelionSmiles. Don’t forget to subscribe so you don’t miss out on the next exciting idea.